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faith like a mustard seed

How can I ever thank you all enough for your prayers?

Sorry I did not give any details about what we are up against with Hailee’s adoption. It just all seemed so crazy, and truthfully, I could not find the words. Thank you for all the very kind comments and e-mails assuring me of your prayers. I appreciate it so very much.

In a nutshell. On Wednesday morning I woke up to an e-mail telling me that there was a 99% chance that we would not be able to bring Hailee home. This was after I so clearly spelled out our situation before we agreed to adopt her. But, I know that our case is so unusual, and so it was easy to overlook certain things. I completely understood…but was absolutely crushed.

The country that Hailee is in requires that there be no more than 45 years between parent and child. That disqualifies Anthony, but not me. They would allow me to adopt her as a ‘single person with consent from my husband’. No problem. Or so we thought.

Then we had the issue of me being a non-US citizen. Again, no problem I was told. Not! As the main petitioner for the adoption, getting the required visa to bring Hailee into the USA would be impossible. You see, the IR3 visa (which is what all orphans are brought into the country on) cannot be issued to a non-citizen. Dilemma number two.

Our problems had only just begun. Even if I could, by some miracle, get another type of visa issued that I could bring Hailee home on, we still had another problem. Money! As a ‘single petitioner’ they look at MY income. Holy moley–many of you know all to well how much money we stay at home moms earn. Yes, that would be a big zero. Nothing. No money in the bank in my name to prove that I can support a child…not to mention the other 5 kiddos at home.

I know, I know. It is all so ridiculous. I mean, for heavens sakes, they would see that I am married. And they would see that my husband has an income because we have to prove it in our dossier. So many of you understand this–they make the process to adopt a child so darn difficult! I will never understand it.

Needless to say, on Wednesday morning I was in a frenzy. I had no idea which way to turn. I could not find any place to get help. I started calling attorneys, but I never got further than the receptionist. If I wanted advice on the phone–I had to pay $200 for a 45 minute consultation. Oh my freaking goodness, all I wanted to know was whether someone could help us–just a simple yes, or no would be good. I did not need a 45 minute consultation! I just needed someone to give me a glimmer of hope in the midst of what seemed like an impossible situation.

I began to sob uncontrollably…things were spiraling downward before my eyes, and I just could not see any hope in it all. I was absolutely heartbroken. I looked at Hailee’s picture and before me was not just any child–darn it, she was OUR child. Nothing made sense. Here was OUR daughter lying in a crib in a third world country–so frail and so weak that we are concerned she will not even be alive in the next six months–and all I was hearing was, “There must be another child, in another country that God intends for you to bring home, this is not going to work out for you.” Actually, no! There is no other child that God has told us to adopt. And, God has NOT closed the door to this adoption yet!

God gives us husbands for a reason. Two ARE better than one. My dear hubby remained calm through the entire day–always pointing me toward Christ and constantly reassuring me that God is faithful. My faith felt like it was hanging on a thread–just barely there. So much smaller than a mustard seed.


Want to know what the Almighty God did? Is there any possible way we can bring Hailee home? It seems absolutely impossible…but is it really?

Well, I guess you’ll just have to read tomorrow.